Your Life – Your Death!

By on July 3, 2019

As a storyteller who makes a lot of noise on the internet, I get invited to a number of events in and around the city. The reasons for being invited usually vary – some being noble and kind, and others being sneaky and underhanded. Sometimes people invite you to their events in the hope that as you go about your usual online noise making, you might say a thing or two about their event and therefore earn them mileage. Other times, you are invited to an event because there is the undocumented assumption that if pictures are taken of you at the said event, all your friends will assume you endorse whatever is happening at that event. Then there are times you are invited for no reason other than just to get you out of your house and into the world, with no expectations on your bald head.

Every now and again I’ll get invited to an event and many times I will immediately pass on the invite to a friend, not because I do not appreciate the gesture or the invite had wrong grammar (This happens sometimes). I often say ‘No’ because I don’t agree with one or two things regarding the event. Most times my disagreements arise from very trivial things like a sponsoring brand I don’t believe in, a location I dislike, a menu I am not comfortable with, another invitee I would rather not meet or the traditional promise that if I attend the event I will get free food, drinks or little goodies like power banks, tee-shirts and memory sticks.

It may occasionally come off as snobbish or even boastful when you say no to an event where you’ve been promised free tickets, alcohol, food, a couple of hugs from gorgeous females and a branded tee-shirt. The widely imagined assumption is that you should be falling over yourself for these things. And perhaps you should – I mean, not everyone gets these invites.

But perhaps not.

When you are younger and more agile, any invite is a big deal since the invites are few and far in between. This is usually because the body is in its prime. You can attend a wild event three or four times a week and still be able to show up in class for lectures, albeit with occasional hangovers every now and again.

As you get older, certain harsh realities begin to dawn on you. A simple invite on Wednesday night will substantially reduce your ability to attend anything else until Monday of the next week. So when invites come flying in on Friday and Saturday, you are going to be as useless as a knitted condom.

It is during times like these you have to make the conscious decision to choose your battles wisely. There is only so much the body can take so you have to be selective. You have to go for events that give you the kind of happiness and joy that you seek in life. You have to go for events that give you the sort of pleasure that you seek in life.

Some of the events I go for turn out to be fun events where I experience life, make horrible decisions under the influence and wake up with a beaten body, sore limbs, memory loss and red eyes (well my eyes are naturally red but, on such mornings,, they are something between bloodshot and devilish). Other events are wonderful events covered in tranquility and soul searching. Usually, such events are out of town and they give my body the break it needs from the hustle and bustle of the God-forsaken city of Kampala. Whether it is a trip to Rwekishokye Country Club in Mbarara for an Out of Town Party, a road trip to Kenya for a massive Reggae Concert, an invite to visit Kigali or a trip to Lunkulu Island for the Bayimba Festival, these often end up adding chapters to the story that is my life.

Every weekend in Kampala brings with it a multitude of parties, luncheons, concerts, festivals and get-togethers. And you have to purpose yourself to simply ignore some of these otherwise you could wind up with a battered body, a wasted life, and an empty soul. Naturally, most of your friends are going to a specific party, you are inclined to want to join. And they will volunteer reasons why you should not miss the ‘party of the year’. However after several years of swinging your self from one party to another, you start to think that perhaps there is no harm in staying home every once in a while, being a couch potato, sucking on ice cubes, watching re-runs of Modern Family on Comedy Central and arguing with people on the internet about the ending of Avengers End Game.

Many people today have the endless urge to want to be a part of something big and to want to show presence everywhere – and this is partly because the world is becoming a smaller and smaller place. But at the end of the day, no human should sacrifice their own personal desires and ambitions so as to fit in with the rest of the world. True, the world could do with your brains, humour, wit, ingenuity, and awesomeness but the bitter fact is that tomorrow when you are gone, the world will still be here and someone with equal or better attributes will replace you. So why not focus on your personal desires, wants, needs and urges. The world will be fine.

If you feel like staying indoors and reading an old book written in Elizabethan English on a Friday night, there are several friends who will openly mock you. If everyone is attending a major concert somewhere in the middle of town and you simply feel like taking a walk down Kampala Road counting cars, hundreds will ridicule you. If you feel like pulling the sheets over your head and catching up on sleep while the rest of the world is out waiting for the clock to strike midnight so they can yell Happy New Year, the world will look at you with disdain. But what did the world ever do for you apart from shoving horrible standards down your throat, forcing impossible expectations on your life and making unfair demands of you?

At the end of the day, YOU are YOUR own master. Everyone will ridicule you, mock you and look down on you for your life choices but not a single soul will put up their hand to take your place when the time to depart this earth comes. If you are the only person going to die your death, why not be the only to live your life?

“The most common regret that people have on their deathbed is that they lived their life according to the desires of others, not how they wanted to.”  ― Dr Prem Jagyasi

a.k.a Beewol
The Talkative Rocker
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Beewol - The Talkative Rocker